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  1. #11
    Wwdnet, I wish that you could teach patience to Mrs. Foster. “She ain’t from around here” either. She doesn’t understand that a trip to Wally World for many here is a family reunion. Isles are blocked by gossipers, children run wild, etc. Wally tried scan-and-go, not realizing that the checkout line is also a reunion or family update stand. The U-Scan stations are typically devoid of all but shoplifters. A cashier told me that the did manage to catch someone paying for a package of beef jerky, but forgot to scan the 50” tv. Honest mistake.

  2. #12
    Quote Originally Posted by Bill Foster View Post
    Wwdnet, I wish that you could teach patience to Mrs. Foster. “She ain’t from around here” either. She doesn’t understand that a trip to Wally World for many here is a family reunion. Isles are blocked by gossipers, children run wild, etc. Wally tried scan-and-go, not realizing that the checkout line is also a reunion or family update stand. The U-Scan stations are typically devoid of all but shoplifters. A cashier told me that the did manage to catch someone paying for a package of beef jerky, but forgot to scan the 50” tv. Honest mistake.

    Oh no, don't get me started on Walmart..... I have some radical ideas.....

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  3. #13
    I would like to hear those ideas, pls

  4. #14
    Administrator protus's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by prc-104 View Post
    I would like to hear those ideas, pls
    Lmao.

    Sorry...having been in a china mart with LD a few times...i can safely say...the riot truck scenes from soylent green would be similar lol.
    Hey Petunia...you dropped your man pad!

  5. #15
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    So do I - Walmart is somewhere I avoid going when at all possible. The local Walmart (2 miles from here) is the most shoplifted Walmart in this entire area!

  6. #16
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    You must go to my Walmart...

  7. #17
    PEOPLE!!!! SOYLENT GREEN IS PEOPLE!!!!
    Liked that movie.
    Soylent Green sure does smell just like what the IDIOTS in Northern Europe and the UN agencies are trying to push down peoples throats with their nonsense.

  8. #18
    communication thoughts.
    slightly off the trend, but..
    2 friends come to mind...
    in a local fund raising group... there's a very well off fellow. a little fella. smaller than any of the rest of us... but very smart... and did i say rich? oh yeah.. BUT,, no one can talk but littleun has to interrupt and give his say. and if that topic/suggestion/proposal doesn't match littleuns expressed opinion littleun will be in speakers face making sure all know how stupid the guy was... he just can't stand not letting everyone know how intelligent he is. and how well connected he is. and how he will shut you down if you don't cowtow to him...

    example 2... a young fellow. also actually very smart. but can't stand not to interrupt every sentence said by others in a meeting... he knows it all. and sometimes he really does know the answer to the question proposal at hand. but he's downright rude. i spoke to him privately, suggesting that if there were 8 people that he let 4 talk before he commented again.. he was offended. he had input to make. so at the restaurant we were gathered again... as a group. he had to put his 2cents in after and frequently during each persons comment... guys were looking at each other, shaking their heads, wondering when is the youngster going to learn... he's been around long enough now...we were each giving the other the signal, "say something to him, and get him to quit interrupting" no one wanted to hurt his feelings...

    maybe they just need to get a little older.

  9. #19
    I think this kind of thing crosses age, education and socio-economic status planes.

    Quite the contrary, bringing it back to Walmart- after the ghetto queens (of all colors) in their pajama pants at noon with their out of control kids running amuck and them being rude arses to everyone, the next worse group is the old people.

    Most have between zero and no awareness that anyone else in the world exists except them, and less care of that fact. Most are retired and just like my buddy Mr. Good Country Boy Neighbor Southern Gentlemen Wanna Be Do Gooder while screwing you guy in the OP, figured because they are retired and hence have all the damn time in the world, that everyone else does also.

    So there is little worse than trying to run through Walmart and get back to work when "gray dawn" is happening at Walmart. All of the hub around scooters are filled with old folks who never seem to be able to drive them- (can't tell you how many times I've been hit by them). It's kind of like on the road- you see the Kleenex box in the back window of the Cadillac doing 45 and half "mowing the grass" (running off the road) then you can fully expect to see the Boomer attack squad of AARP Company 1947 in the seats. Probably 2 men in the front seats and two women in the back seats. Broads get in the back!!! LOL

    Once in Walmart they will congregate in the worst possible high traffic areas- usually by the front where the carts are. With Zero awareness or care of anyone except themselves, they will stay in the way yaking while you are attempting to get a cart. After a polite 30 second to a minute wait while standing clearly where they should be able to see that they are blocking you, then they MAY hear you when you say loudly "excuse me sir." But experience says that may take 2 to 3 attempts to do that.

    Then your sure to get the Boomer stink eye, because as Boomers they have been programmed to never feel like they are in the wrong for most things, so surely standing in the way for 2 minutes and impeding commerce was not THEIR fault also.

    When you see them in the aisles individually, they will somehow be mostly blocking the entire aisle with a single cart or hub around scooter. They must really have to work to attain this goal as I can never achieve this when I try- yes I've experimented with this in an attempt to harness these techniques but it seems to be age hacked to Gen X'ers. (I promise to continue experiments over the next 30 years and report back) But since this is Gray Dawn technically anything is possible, including parachutes with AARP symbols on them raining down on the city and well armed Boomers locking us Gen X'ers up. And worse of all, we (Gen X'ers) will have to rely on Millenials and Gen Z to save the town now!! So Gen X'ers like me are in the middle of a huge crap sandwich without the bread!!!

    Now if two or more old folks are in the same aisle at the same time- Turn around and go to another aisle. There is NOTHING, I repeat NOTHING in that aisle worth the wait. Insulin necessary for your child's life? Shotgun rounds to fend off the assaulting geriatric hordes recently rioting at the senior center? Nope, nothing is worth it in that aisle. As the lord Humungous said- "just walk away, your life will be your own, just walk away!"

    At the checkout aisle- start praying a few minutes before that you can find a checkout aisle devoid of old folks in line (see one of my solutions to this below). Unfortunately you cannot always avoid old folks in line. Now at the checkout I would normally say normal stuff like: "Look at how much stuff is in their cart" and the all important know the cashier theme which can make or break ten minutes of your life. However with old folks in the line, those usually important criteria are thrown out the window.

    Say for example Gram Gram has only 8 small items in her cart/buggy? Good risk to get in that line because of the smaller number of items in her cart right? For anyone else not taking Geritol and SSI payments the answer would be that the less number of items in the cart(s) of the people ahead of you COULD mean yes you will be out of that line quicker.

    However Gram Gram has to:

    0.5. Know she is in Walmart
    1. Know she is in the checkout line and worse off- remember she is in the checkout line.
    2. Not chat with the cashier the entire time up to and including long after payment should have been tendered.
    3. Not sit there and watch every single item being scanned as well as discuss the price of every item being scanned- ALL THE WHILE not even beginning to reach into her purse for payment yet- that's yet another 3 minutes of your life lost to Boomers.

    So the line with Gram Gram and her just 8 items in the cart can and has literally taken more time than getting behind the white trash family with the "buggy" full of white bread, nasty pink hotdogs, Bud Light, carton of Marlboro Reds, sixteen big bags of potato chips and a dozen 2 liter bottles of off brand soda.

    Further exasperating the situation at the checkout is that whole new fangled payment device- you know the Credit card machine.

    Old folks seem to safeguard against this "new" technology by waiting till every single item is scanned, the total read aloud to them, the cashier standing there looking at them expectantly and flittering around with the plastic bags before Gram Gram ever even opens her still closed and closely guarded purse.

    Now the fun begins!

    If they are one of the last three people on earth still writing checks at Walmart, they will usually be the one in front of me. Did you know that their is no way whatsoever to open your purse before the transaction is finalized? There is no way possible to know ahead of time that you intend to write a check and therefore have almost the entire check already written out while the cashier is ringing everything up. It's literally an impossible thing to foresee, certainly some evil divination is in effect if one was to be so proactive!

    And whether you are writing that physical check or using that new fangled machine with the electric pen- BE ABSOLUTELY SURE to write slowly and methodically because just like that 3rd grade penmanship class, how clearly and artfully you sign your name while taking another 1/2 minute of time will surely affect your life. I understand that Walmart gathers those electronic signatures and regularly has a penmanship contest for old folks, complete with free coffee and discussions on getting more out of Medicare Part D plans.

    So please take more of my time when you use this opportunity to recreate that 3rd Grade Penmanship contest you entered in 1939. God forbid you just scribble something on that screen and get on with your life. I have all the time in the world as you do as well so please take my time and write legibly cause you know, this actually matters!!! You might win that penmanship contest Walmart has for old folks!!!

    Once your finally through at the checkout you can safely begin with high speed dodge the gray heads game. That involves rapid movement in avoiding gaggles of geriatrics as they further congregate in poor locations to discuss not getting enough SSI and complain about things. Normally this means the exit areas- another sticky wicket in the avoiding gray game. Gram Gram slowly tottering out the exit is SURELY going to run into some other "nana" or "gam gam" she knows and will immediately stop forward movement while bringing carts into blocking formation before commencing to discuss important matters for 3-5 minutes while completely unaware of the world around them.

    This is where the caveat "know your exits" comes into play. You can play Gray Dodge here safely if you act proactively, move quickly and know your exits. If not, if you get in the parade behind the other 2 or 3 shoppers that are politely standing with their carts behind the Yalta Grandma conference, you will lose at least another 2 minutes of your time.

    Once free of the store, you move quickly with your cart, eyes darting side to side on alert for grays in armored ramming devices (old folks in death machines aka their vehicles). Linear danger areas (LDAs) remain a problem as they do in any other tactical exercise. You can "patch to the road" if you have family with you and are attempting to protect the lives of younger Americans with a future of paying for Gran Grans SSI payments. However I find it easier to literally just run. Rally point is always your vehicle but often times it's every Gen X and Gen Z for themselves in my family! Familial, DNA and love connections be damned when your lives are at risk! No one wants to end up trapped under the big Cadillac or Oldsmobile with the box of Kleenex in the back window while Gram Gram is stretching to see over the steering wheel while attempting to back up probably running you over again!

    Once safely in your vehicle, turn on some Death Metal or a good soothing song like "Let the bodies hit the floor" and take a second to recompose yourself. The fight is never over! You still have to avoid their armored death wagons while leaving the parking lot and on the way home. If your unfortunate enough to live in a high senior population density area (HSPD) then you can truly never drop your guard until safely locked inside your home. For those of us fortunate enough to live in less gray areas, the ride home is generally safe aside from pill poppers and illegals driving too slow in an attempt to avoid being pulled over and having their immigration status checked.

    Some general Gray Dawn avoidance tactics-

    *Attempt to do shopping at night. Gray's have diminished night vision and therefore are day walkers, aka "gray walkers."

    *Never ever no matter the starvation involved, never go to a Hardees before 10am.

    *Never attempt to converse with a gray unless you are off work for the day and can be involved for at least half an hour of time. If trapped, try to break contact by bringing the conversation to how the country is beset upon with too many entitlement programs and that ALL of them should be cut immediately. At first they will likely think this just means free chik'in for the ghetto chickens and will agree wholeheartedly. This could prolong the conversation with "we all worked in my day" tangents but astute ones will understand this means also medicare so they will quickly end the conversation.

    I have divulged enough secrets from my playbook today... I may at some point publish my app "Boomer Boogaloo" at some point in the future with algorithms that factor in which Walmart you are at, time of day, sales, density of grays in the general area, COUPONS, availability of free coffee and honeybuns and weather. Using all this data my app will calculate your safest and quickest exit for your family from the Boomer Boogaloo.

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    "Don't be too proud of this technological terror you've constructed..."

  10. #20
    ld, you win... lol..
    l think you could get some compensation, if you'd send this to some of the larger city newpapers in your state... they should pay for this story.. i was nodding my head up and down. yep. seen that... yep, been there. over and over...

    edited to add...
    hmm i know an ole boy who checks in here now and then..
    hair is gray.
    belly looks like he drinks to much beer.
    walks slower than he used to.
    has been seen riding one of those walmart scooters..
    has a slight case of crs.
    willing to stand there and talk to a fella, ifin it's been a while since they've crossed paths.
    is retired.
    drives a lot slower than he used to.
    watches his pennies and the store receipt .
    lol... maybe ld has seen Him at wally world.. sheet .
    Last edited by rockriver; 11-20-2019 at 05:45 PM.

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